fehus | IC INBOX ✺ MASKORMENACE

? yeah i know

No I mean I'm a terrible friend? Like, genuinely.

I'm so sorry?

oh no what did you do

more like what DIDN'T I do

what did you say to odin alex might actually murder him soon since the tent thing

actually... it's something re: you

I'm so sorry? It was thoughtless of me bro

I forgot to give you this Monday's fact

FWD: MAGNUS IM A BAD FRIEND

LUCKY FOR YOU I remembered in time to send it to you now, on this blessed Thursday. Now, because of the misfortune you must've endured at not having your weekly sex fact delivered promptly on its regular Monday - we will not only ensure you get it - but we, meaning me of course, feel obliged to give you a BONUS FACT for today as well.

Happy ~~Monday~~ THURSDAY! You are subscribed to gain 1 new amazing sex fact every Monday, from now until 3030. This is a non-negotiable steal of a deal that you missed every opportunity to negate and now must sit back and enjoy! Text 'wiggly' to 696969 to receive (2) TWO facts every Monday and upgrade your subscription today!

Today's FIRST amazing sex fact:

❝DID YOU KNOW that natural vag lubricant contains a substance called squalene, which is also found in shark livers. I googled this fact in a panic to give you something but that's kinda metal, don't you think?❞

Today's BONUS amazing sex fact:

❝ they call pubic wigs merkins. those exist. wtf❞

ThOSE WERE your zany, amazing sex factS for this Monday! Enjoy knowing them bc honestly you think this would be more fun to text you but now it's just like a 9-5 job but nonetheless Text STOP to this number to sign up for 5 weekly facts and type SIGN ME UP to discontinue receiving these messages.

i already knew what a merkin was.

> STOP
> STOP
> STOP
> STOP

Text STOP to this number to sign up for 5 weekly facts and type SIGN ME UP to discontinue receiving these messages.

CONGRATS ON SIGNING UP FOR MORE I honestly didn't think you would