[he hadn't noticed the odd quiet from Alex the first or second or -- okay, being completely honest -- the third day. mostly, because it took him that long to really get back to status quo, which said something kind of alarming about Persephone's power, given that he's literally a healing demigod, fortified by the will of Odin, in the prime of his death. but Magnus hadn't employed any alf seidr since the concert, or called on Frey, not even to heat their tent at night, still feeling weirdly sore in his demi-bones, or whatever]
[he noticed by the fourth day, which was yesterday. he doesn't press, because Alex had a right to his own private thoughts, even if constantly looking up and finding two-toned eyes staring at him intently was doing something serious to his finally regained equilibrium (aka, utterly fucking ruining it). and today, the fifth day, Alex had been weird before he went to work, and Magnus isn't surprised that he's still off. sitting in the grass across the fire from him, Magnus is using the light generated by the flames to try and figure out what was wrong with the crappy, small space heater they'd picked up in De Chima. although he's got the back open and is sort of poking around with a screwdriver, he has literally no clue what he's doing. in the distance, there's a dull thwacking and humming, of Jack having fun chopping up probably too much wood, which is his favourite camp chore]
[Magnus is much more attuned to the workings of Alex, and feels his tension the second he comes back (home), doesn't seem to know what to do with himself around the campsite. it's stupid to think as he looks up, but Magnus really likes the way he did his hair today -- and is just about to open his mouth to, maybe try and express that? when Alex cuts him off with a question]
[grey eyes blink rapidly, and he suddenly feels grateful he didn't say the thing he wanted to say. his breathing feels a little shallow, and he doesn't know why, because he's not even sure what Alex is getting at?]
-- What do you mean?
[like, as a team? like, as friends? like, as a duo of one lame, weak person clearly leaning a lot on the other, stronger one? he wants to clarify, but also doesn't]
[ he should tell him to forget it, move on, ignore the weird thing happening between the two of them. he's done okay so far, after all, hasn't he? it's not worth the hurt, because of course it's going to hurt. he's going to ruin everything, and then they won't even be friends anymore, and alex honestly isn't sure if he's strong enough to lose magnus completely.
he opens his mouth to say it--nevermind, forget it--and instead, what comes out is: ] I think I love you? [ holy shit. ] I mean, maybe. I don't-- I haven't-- [ oh god, his face is going hot. he feels like a stranger's taken up residence in his body. ] I don't exactly make friends, much less--
[ a vague gesture of his hands, and his glance drops to them. he picks at a hangnail. ] But.. at the concert, all I could think about was getting you home safe, and the way you look at me sometimes, I-- [ mismatched eyes lift, uncharacteristically nervous. ] And I was so scared, I haven't been that scared in ten years, not even when I knew I was dying. I was angry then, but not afraid. But seeing you like that was the worst thing I've experienced in a long time.
[if a stranger's taken up residence in Alex's body, an alien's taken up residence in Magnus'. he feels like he's forgotten basic human functions, just sitting there, staring at him. he's expecting something along the lines of we're so boring together! we should go out more! because Alex is fun and bright and exciting and probably doesn't want to sit around a campsite all day watching Magnus read and eat too many clementines]
[that is not what Alex says. what Alex says is, I think I love you? and then looks like he's caught a fever. Alex never blushes. Alex laughs at those weak enough to blush, namely, him, who has a fair complexion and low tolerance for certain types of embarrassing things (like that pic Persephone had sent, of her scooby-doo sex van?). that's not the point. the point is that -- Alex is still agonizing, over the concert, over the mistake he made (he won't convince him otherwise, even if they were always there for eachother). Magnus swallows, and the screwdriver he doesn't know how to use slips from his fingers]
-- Um. Uh.
[oh my gods. make words. make words, and stop staring at Alex's face, more vulnerable than he ever looks. Magnus is scared now, too. he doesn't know what's going through Alex's head at all]
...We're family now. You and me, and, Sam and TJ and everybody. I'm -- I remember sort of losing it, that way, when I thought Blitz was dying? But he was okay, and I'm okay. [...] I don't mind being that to you. Loved.
[a flush paints itself across his face. he wants to assure Alex that he can have those feelings, of family and love and wanting to protect someone more than anything. he thought something along those lines, anyway, when Alex carried him home, confessing a fear he didn't seem quite capable of handling. now, he's trying to handle it, and Magnus hopes he's not being completely stupid, with his response]
It's normal to get that scared, when -- you love someone you think of as family.
[ he doesn't get it. of course he doesn't get it, because he still hasn't figured any of this out for himself, and because alex just doesn't let himself close enough to people for something like this to happen, and because magnus has no idea how amazing he is.
it's not that he's wrong, of course, because the longer alex is with floor nineteen and hearth and blitz and samirah, the more he realizes that they are all a type of family. they've had his back, and they'll continue to have his back, in a way that he's never had before. that's an incredibly precious thing to alex, and something that he'll fight to keep.
it's not the whole of it, though, and for a few moments, he's not quite certain if he should continue. maybe he should just leave it there? nod, change the subject, pretend that's what he meant. honestly, though, at this point, he just wants to be understood-- and he's never backed down from anything. he shouldn't start now, right? ]
You dummy, [ he sighs softly, fondly, and unfolds himself from his chair, dusting himself off. ] That's not what I mean. [ he hesitates, then takes the two steps that'll bring him directly in front of magnus. he bends, then, hands reaching to tilt the blond's face up, and his braid slips over his shoulder and slaps magnus in the chest just as his lips brush the other teen's.
it only lasts a moment or two before he's pulling back again, face still red and expression cautious and a little flustered. ] I mean, you know, like-- like that.
[okay, so. just getting some bearings here: did Jack go on a chopping bender and release Fenrir from his bonds? did the World Serpent wake up and start throwing a shit fit? did Naglfar set sail on its non-stop pleasure cruise to the tropic isles of Everything's Fuckedtopia? because Alex Fierro, Alex Fierro, just kissed him, and the world must be ending]
[there's just no way otherwise, that this would be happening to him, Magnus Chase, one-time asthmatic, comic-book reading loser, long-time (like, eternally long-time) failure of a mighty Norse warrior. Alex Fierro is the strongest, smartest, most beautiful person Magnus has ever laid his eyes on, and he just -- he just kissed him, after what -- after what apparently, was a love confession]
[Magnus feels like looking up at the sky to check -- did the sun and moon get eaten by wolves yet? are the skies raining, with Jormungandr's awful poison spray? are the einherjar charging out, for one last wild, desperate bid for glory? but he can't look up. he can't look away, from two-toned eyes cautiously watching him gape like a fucking dead cod]
Oh.
[his voice is rough, like he's just been shouting all his questions to the sky. hey, Odin? can he get a little wisdom down here? no? he's on his own]
[(he's not. on his own, that is, anymore. he's with Alex, and he -- he loves being with Alex, and if Alex likes him -- the thought ends there. it's so huge, it's monumental, it's insane)]
Yeah, um, that is, different, 'cuz I didn't. I didn't kiss Blitz, or anything, after his whole traumatic. Um. Event.
[he can't take his eyes off of Alex, not even to check if the world's ending]
Not like you just kissed me. I think. That was a kiss, right?
[just -- just making sure. it was so light, and fast, and also he got hit with hair? and he was too shocked to really process the feel of Alex's hands on his face or his lips -- oh, hel]
[ holy shit, magnus is looking at him like he's never seen him before, and he's not completely sure how he should take it. is that like a good gape-and-babble knock-out combo or "gross, my pseudo-sister/brother just laid one on me" kind of babbling? with magnus, it's not always immediately apparent, especially when he's clearly trying to gather up his thoughts.
he's not looking especially disgusted, though. just, well, stunned. and who can blame him? alex isn't really sure why he's so determined to apparently upset the status quo. things are good between them already, why is he trying to add this unnecessary, confusing new element?
maybe because honestly, it's not all that new. he's not stupid. and for all that he's self-conscious about this and doubting himself, he knows that the way magnus talks to him and looks at him and treats him isn't the same as he is with sam. there's something here. ]
Yeah, [ he says at last, a little hoarsely, and his thumbs brush magnus's cheekbones, feeling his hair against his knuckles. it wasn't much of a kiss, honestly, but.. ] Should I do it again? To prove it.
[and the thing is -- Magnus isn't stupid, either (he's a Chase, after all). he knows he feels -- not just something, but everything, around Alex, can't push him out of his brain or sight or heart or skin, no matter how repeatedly he's tried to slam those doors shut inside himself, incapable of seeing any positive outcome, where he didn't somehow fuck everything up. of course he's not disgusted, he could never be disgusted by Alex. it's just -- he's never had these kinds of feelings before, not ever, and certainly not this strongly. which is stupid, because he doesn't even know what his sexuality is. he's never had so much to lose, if he messes this up, like he tends to mess shit up, and Alex never wants to talk to him again. most importantly, he doesn't know what Alex Fierro could possibly see in him, how he could possibly want him in the same clawingly distracting way Magnus, when he just -- lets himself -- wants him. he doesn't know anything, and he's clueless, as usual, even if he's not explicitly stupid]
[ -- apart from how he does know, that he wants Alex to kiss him again. that might be the only clear thought he's had, in the last ten minutes]
Yeah. [he swallows thickly, heart striking harder against his chest than a drunk thane pounding his goblet on the Feast Hall table. his skin feels like it's being enchanted, under Alex's fingers, narrow and seidr weaving] Prove it.
[ oh. for a moment or two, he's not sure he can breathe, because good things happen so rarely to alex that he was sure this was going to backfire. instead, magnus is looking at him like he's struck between amazement and disbelief, and he-- he wants alex to kiss him again, and he's pretty sure they're now firmly in twilight zone territory.
before he can overthink it, though, he leans back in, nose briefly bumping magnus before he gets the angle right, catching his mouth again. he's more confident this time, fingers curling in the blond's hair.
alex has never been his mother, so poetry isn't his thing, and he'd never admit this, but magnus tastes like warmth and sunlight. his lips are a little chapped, firmer than he was expecting, and he still can't quite believe they're doing this. that he's doing this, when he'd told himself he wouldn't let something like this happen to him.
he pulls back at last with a quick second kiss to the space just below the other teen's lower lip, then simply sinks down to his haunches, then back into the grass. ] So I think that was basically like licking something to claim it, right? You're mine now, sorry, I don't make the rules.
[Magnus is absolutely sure he can't breathe, which is fine, since Alex is leaning in to share his breath, anyway. this is Magnus' second kiss in his entire life/death -- third, if they're counting that brush before -- and it's by far the best one. none of the others had his heart stopping quite so abruptly in his chest, just from Alex shifting and angling close, from the smell of him up close, smoke from the fire and their shared, fancy soap]
[the moment Alex slots their lips together, he feels an ache in his chest that's somewhat intolerable, because he's not his father, and never believed in sappy romantic crap, but the rightness he's slammed with in that moment is undeniable. kissing gently back at Alex's lips, he tastes magic and something dark and wonderfully addictive, like maybe he had hot chocolate earlier, and Magnus wants Alex to keep kissing him, maybe always? and wonders if that's going to be a problem. it seems like it's going to be a problem, frankly]
[Magnus is nervous, about touching Alex, about touching period, even with Alex's mouth sealed over his and a hand in his hair, steadying him from probably passing out in shock. it takes him a few long seconds, in turn, to work up the courage to rest his hand at the side of the other's neck. his palm lands so light and careful there, fingertips just brushing long green hair]
[the second kiss is -- stupidly charming, and it's this one he turns scarlet from, and when he laughs at what Alex has to say, it's clear and bright, summer-kissed; literally]
That -- [clears his throat, gone rough again] -- that, is such a weird way to ask somebody out? I mean, I'm not, like an expert.
[he's pretty sure that's what Alex is trying to say. not a hundred percent, though, and grey eyes are anxiously watching amber-and-brown, for a clue]
[ he can't believe he just did that. he can't believe this is happening. it doesn't feel entirely real, that magnus kissed him back, that he's blushing and laughing and not-- upset, not angry that alex is the way he is. he kissed him back, and he put his hand on his nape, and it was like electricity, feeling the rough pads of his fingers catching at his hair, stroking his skin.
he always touches alex like he's precious, and he should have known that it meant.. more. something else. (their rooms in valhalla are exactly alike, and that should have been their first hint.)
he scoots forward in the grass, and because he can, he tucks his folded legs in against magnus's, leaning forward and curling his hands atop the other teen's thighs. gods, this is so weird and new and right, and honestly kind of scary. ]
It's perfectly legitimate. [ yeah. yeah, he guesses he is asking him out. holy shit. ] Magnus Chase, you should definitely date me.
[what is scary is having the object of your deeply repressed affections confess their love, kiss your entire world open, and then proceed to plant their hands on your thighs and lean close enough to, he believes, smell your thoughts, while asking you out, all in the span of less than ten minutes. Magnus is -- feeling, a lot of things, and his heart is beating rabbit fast even before Alex flattens his palms against his legs. his breath stutters, and he looks down, shoulders curling up and in, as Alex leans forward; he's shy, overwhelmed by so much Alex in his immediate space, after so long of no one there, much less his obviously-obvious crush]
[Magnus is still looking down and away, nervously smoothing hair back behind his ear, as he tries to pick a single thought out of the chaos of his brain, which, now that Ragnarok isn't descending around him, has become alarmingly real and physical and full to the brim of Alex Fierro]
Um. I'd, um. [god, he's so dumb? why won't Alex back up a bit, so he can think straight?] -- You make a compelling kiss. Case. Oh, my gods, please back up just a second, so I can make words and say yeah, ok? -- Oh.
[he just did. an amazing, Casanova-start, certainly]
[ holy shit. magnus is fucking adorable, and he's allowed to think that now, he's allowed to really pay attention to that kind of thing. magnus likes him, magnus wants to date him, and it seems surreal to imagine, when magnus can literally have anyone he wants.
he finds he's grinning, heart feeling too big for his chest, and instead of backing off, he leans in further, kissing magnus again just because he can.
it's official, he guesses. he's turning into a sap, and he might be in love with magnus, and-- and now they're dating. ] You're ridiculous, but you're cute. [ he reaches up, gently pushing stray hair behind magnus's ear, then withdrawing to give them both some space. this is.. a lot. this is huge, for both of them, and neither of them are particularly touchy-feely most days. still, it feels good to want it, and to know that magnus doesn't mind. ]
[and between the kiss -- another kiss, gods -- and Alex's grin, and that gentle hand in his hair, Magnus does look ridiculous, because he's completely and utterly dazed by it all. it's only when, as Magnus predicted, Alex withdraws out of his lap, that he's able to form a completely -- well, mostly coherent -- sentence]
-- Wait. I forgot to say I, uh, that I, liked you... no, wait, I didn't forget, you didn't give me a chance, you just kept kissing me?
[his expression is dumbfounded by this reality, but then his determination rallies, wanting to make sure one thing is clear]
But I do. Um. Like you, that is. ...A lot.
[if Alex is turning into a sap, Magnus is turning into a disaster. he rubs his red face with both hands, hair getting a little wild from the treatment. ]
[ this still doesn't feel entirely real. he's going to wake up, or find out this was some kind of hallucination caused by his mother, or-- something. he's not allowed to have.. this. and gods, he knows it's going to make magnus even more of a target than before if his mother realizes.
but her mother isn't here, and alex won't let anything happen to magnus, either. ]
I know, [ he says at last, reaching out to gently tug at magnus's hands, drawing them away from his face so he can meet his eyes. ] If I hadn't realized, I wouldn't have said anything. It's-- [ his lips part, then shut, and his glance slides away from magnus's face, color rising in his face again. ] It's, uh, kind of hard to believe, since I know I'm a lot to deal with, but I'm.. happy. I guess.
[that's unfair, that Alex has tugged his hands away, and then made him instead look at how -- cute he is, with that blush going across his fine nose and parting lips and perfect cheekbones. he flusters, arguing pointlessly with intent grey eyes, forgetting to take his hand back]
How is that hard to believe? You're, you. Who wouldn't like you...?
[more evidence of the sincere belief Magnus holds, that to him, Alex is beyond anything mortals -- or dead demigods -- could even dream of attaining. but then something hits him. an almost put-out look comes up on his face]
Wait. How did you know I liked you?
[he's pretty sure he kept that shit on lock? gods, he was barely letting himself think about it. was he really broadcasting it, or something...?]
[ he gives him a funny look, then glances down at their hands, where he's still gently holding the backs of the other teen's. ] Come on, Magnus, you know how most people react to Loki's kids. [ he presses the hands in his, then releases him, leaning back on his palms. ] Not to mention the whole argr thing. [ he makes a face at the term, rolling his eyes. ] Lots of people still don't quite know how to handle trans people. And I know you're different, and now that floor nineteen is educated, they're different, but most of Valhalla still thinks I'm weird and probably untrustworthy.
[ not to mention the lessons he'd learned while homeless, and the ones his parents had rather unintentionally taught him. magnus had been an unexpected, unlooked for, amazing gift.
he glances back up, then, lips quirking up. ] --Please. I'm not blind, Magnus. It took a while to put two and two together, but you get all doe-eyed around me sometimes.
[and for as much as Magnus needed space to think before, he misses the warmth of Alex's hands almost instantly, when he pulls back, his fingertips buzzing with the lost sensation. he wonders if this is what it's going to be like -- dating Alex Fierro, constantly feeling like some kind of static is pushing them together or apart, an electric storm across his skin]
[he's not stupid, and he knows people -- unfortunately, a cynical side of them -- but he still doesn't quite see Alex's point. he was more than Loki's kid, argr was an oudated term for viking jocks, and being trans and genderfluid only made Alex more special and more unique than anyone else in the room by far. his personality was forged on those two hammers throughout his crap life, and he came out so strong and beautiful of a person for it. speaking of beautiful -- gods, that dress he wore to the swear in, when he was a she -- who gave a shit who her mom was, when she looked like that? who gave a shit who his mom was, sitting in front of Magnus, with the fire casting warm highlights into his long green hair? ugh]
[but it's something to argue about later, though, because he's just been insulted by the boy he's agreed to date, five seconds ago]
-- I do not get doe eyed. I'm a fearsome dead warrior of Odin, son of... ok, well, the Frey thing doesn't, er, really help me here, but. I'm not Bambi.
[he laughs, a flush riding high on his cheeks again]
You're kind of Bambi, [ he shoots back immediately, grinning despite himself, face nearly aching with the smiling he's done this conversation. it's ridiculous, they're both ridiculous, and no one makes him this happy like magnus does. he hasn't had a lot of reason to be happy over the course of his life, but.. now he has friends and a sister and-- and a boyfriend, he guesses. that's what it means to date someone, right? magnus is.. his boyfriend.
weird.
he stretches his legs out, because he wants the contact again, calf against the blond's hip. he's never liked people touching him, but now he can't seem to get enough of it. he wants to take magnus's hand again, just because he can, and it's the strangest impulse. (magnus likes him, all of him, male and female.) ]
That's the second time you've called me cute in this conversation.
[maybe it's something he should object to, along the same lines as "Bambi" or, in other conversations, "fuzzy" or "exceedingly Hufflepuff," but instead he's also grinning. if Alex Fierro thinks he's cute, he -- really can only be thrilled about it, honestly. he's stupidly, wonderfully thrilled about it, and it's all over his stupid rosy face, not quite hidden even behind his ducked head and hanging blond hair]
[when Alex presses his calf against his hip, Magnus, after a moment of clear hesitation (the impulse always feels natural, but to think he can touch him -- that he wants to touch him -- is, like it is for Alex, shockingly strange and new), Magnus drops his hand gently around Alex's ankle, just as he'd done a few weeks ago. it rests just as softly and carefully as it did then, but his smile is so much brighter]
[and, gods damn it to Friggin' Hel and a whole bunch of other Norse-themed swear words, when he looks at Alex, he's doe eyed, hopeless]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
??? we just don't know ???
[he noticed by the fourth day, which was yesterday. he doesn't press, because Alex had a right to his own private thoughts, even if constantly looking up and finding two-toned eyes staring at him intently was doing something serious to his finally regained equilibrium (aka, utterly fucking ruining it). and today, the fifth day, Alex had been weird before he went to work, and Magnus isn't surprised that he's still off. sitting in the grass across the fire from him, Magnus is using the light generated by the flames to try and figure out what was wrong with the crappy, small space heater they'd picked up in De Chima. although he's got the back open and is sort of poking around with a screwdriver, he has literally no clue what he's doing. in the distance, there's a dull thwacking and humming, of Jack having fun chopping up probably too much wood, which is his favourite camp chore]
[Magnus is much more attuned to the workings of Alex, and feels his tension the second he comes back (home), doesn't seem to know what to do with himself around the campsite. it's stupid to think as he looks up, but Magnus really likes the way he did his hair today -- and is just about to open his mouth to, maybe try and express that? when Alex cuts him off with a question]
[grey eyes blink rapidly, and he suddenly feels grateful he didn't say the thing he wanted to say. his breathing feels a little shallow, and he doesn't know why, because he's not even sure what Alex is getting at?]
-- What do you mean?
[like, as a team? like, as friends? like, as a duo of one lame, weak person clearly leaning a lot on the other, stronger one? he wants to clarify, but also doesn't]
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he opens his mouth to say it--nevermind, forget it--and instead, what comes out is: ] I think I love you? [ holy shit. ] I mean, maybe. I don't-- I haven't-- [ oh god, his face is going hot. he feels like a stranger's taken up residence in his body. ] I don't exactly make friends, much less--
[ a vague gesture of his hands, and his glance drops to them. he picks at a hangnail. ] But.. at the concert, all I could think about was getting you home safe, and the way you look at me sometimes, I-- [ mismatched eyes lift, uncharacteristically nervous. ] And I was so scared, I haven't been that scared in ten years, not even when I knew I was dying. I was angry then, but not afraid. But seeing you like that was the worst thing I've experienced in a long time.
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[if a stranger's taken up residence in Alex's body, an alien's taken up residence in Magnus'. he feels like he's forgotten basic human functions, just sitting there, staring at him. he's expecting something along the lines of we're so boring together! we should go out more! because Alex is fun and bright and exciting and probably doesn't want to sit around a campsite all day watching Magnus read and eat too many clementines]
[that is not what Alex says. what Alex says is, I think I love you? and then looks like he's caught a fever. Alex never blushes. Alex laughs at those weak enough to blush, namely, him, who has a fair complexion and low tolerance for certain types of embarrassing things (like that pic Persephone had sent, of her scooby-doo sex van?). that's not the point. the point is that -- Alex is still agonizing, over the concert, over the mistake he made (he won't convince him otherwise, even if they were always there for eachother). Magnus swallows, and the screwdriver he doesn't know how to use slips from his fingers]
-- Um. Uh.
[oh my gods. make words. make words, and stop staring at Alex's face, more vulnerable than he ever looks. Magnus is scared now, too. he doesn't know what's going through Alex's head at all]
...We're family now. You and me, and, Sam and TJ and everybody. I'm -- I remember sort of losing it, that way, when I thought Blitz was dying? But he was okay, and I'm okay. [...] I don't mind being that to you. Loved.
[a flush paints itself across his face. he wants to assure Alex that he can have those feelings, of family and love and wanting to protect someone more than anything. he thought something along those lines, anyway, when Alex carried him home, confessing a fear he didn't seem quite capable of handling. now, he's trying to handle it, and Magnus hopes he's not being completely stupid, with his response]
It's normal to get that scared, when -- you love someone you think of as family.
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it's not that he's wrong, of course, because the longer alex is with floor nineteen and hearth and blitz and samirah, the more he realizes that they are all a type of family. they've had his back, and they'll continue to have his back, in a way that he's never had before. that's an incredibly precious thing to alex, and something that he'll fight to keep.
it's not the whole of it, though, and for a few moments, he's not quite certain if he should continue. maybe he should just leave it there? nod, change the subject, pretend that's what he meant. honestly, though, at this point, he just wants to be understood-- and he's never backed down from anything. he shouldn't start now, right? ]
You dummy, [ he sighs softly, fondly, and unfolds himself from his chair, dusting himself off. ] That's not what I mean. [ he hesitates, then takes the two steps that'll bring him directly in front of magnus. he bends, then, hands reaching to tilt the blond's face up, and his braid slips over his shoulder and slaps magnus in the chest just as his lips brush the other teen's.
it only lasts a moment or two before he's pulling back again, face still red and expression cautious and a little flustered. ] I mean, you know, like-- like that.
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[there's just no way otherwise, that this would be happening to him, Magnus Chase, one-time asthmatic, comic-book reading loser, long-time (like, eternally long-time) failure of a mighty Norse warrior. Alex Fierro is the strongest, smartest, most beautiful person Magnus has ever laid his eyes on, and he just -- he just kissed him, after what -- after what apparently, was a love confession]
[Magnus feels like looking up at the sky to check -- did the sun and moon get eaten by wolves yet? are the skies raining, with Jormungandr's awful poison spray? are the einherjar charging out, for one last wild, desperate bid for glory? but he can't look up. he can't look away, from two-toned eyes cautiously watching him gape like a fucking dead cod]
Oh.
[his voice is rough, like he's just been shouting all his questions to the sky. hey, Odin? can he get a little wisdom down here? no? he's on his own]
[(he's not. on his own, that is, anymore. he's with Alex, and he -- he loves being with Alex, and if Alex likes him -- the thought ends there. it's so huge, it's monumental, it's insane)]
Yeah, um, that is, different, 'cuz I didn't. I didn't kiss Blitz, or anything, after his whole traumatic. Um. Event.
[he can't take his eyes off of Alex, not even to check if the world's ending]
Not like you just kissed me. I think. That was a kiss, right?
[just -- just making sure. it was so light, and fast, and also he got hit with hair? and he was too shocked to really process the feel of Alex's hands on his face or his lips -- oh, hel]
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he's not looking especially disgusted, though. just, well, stunned. and who can blame him? alex isn't really sure why he's so determined to apparently upset the status quo. things are good between them already, why is he trying to add this unnecessary, confusing new element?
maybe because honestly, it's not all that new. he's not stupid. and for all that he's self-conscious about this and doubting himself, he knows that the way magnus talks to him and looks at him and treats him isn't the same as he is with sam. there's something here. ]
Yeah, [ he says at last, a little hoarsely, and his thumbs brush magnus's cheekbones, feeling his hair against his knuckles. it wasn't much of a kiss, honestly, but.. ] Should I do it again? To prove it.
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[ -- apart from how he does know, that he wants Alex to kiss him again. that might be the only clear thought he's had, in the last ten minutes]
Yeah. [he swallows thickly, heart striking harder against his chest than a drunk thane pounding his goblet on the Feast Hall table. his skin feels like it's being enchanted, under Alex's fingers, narrow and seidr weaving] Prove it.
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before he can overthink it, though, he leans back in, nose briefly bumping magnus before he gets the angle right, catching his mouth again. he's more confident this time, fingers curling in the blond's hair.
alex has never been his mother, so poetry isn't his thing, and he'd never admit this, but magnus tastes like warmth and sunlight. his lips are a little chapped, firmer than he was expecting, and he still can't quite believe they're doing this. that he's doing this, when he'd told himself he wouldn't let something like this happen to him.
he pulls back at last with a quick second kiss to the space just below the other teen's lower lip, then simply sinks down to his haunches, then back into the grass. ] So I think that was basically like licking something to claim it, right? You're mine now, sorry, I don't make the rules.
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[the moment Alex slots their lips together, he feels an ache in his chest that's somewhat intolerable, because he's not his father, and never believed in sappy romantic crap, but the rightness he's slammed with in that moment is undeniable. kissing gently back at Alex's lips, he tastes magic and something dark and wonderfully addictive, like maybe he had hot chocolate earlier, and Magnus wants Alex to keep kissing him, maybe always? and wonders if that's going to be a problem. it seems like it's going to be a problem, frankly]
[Magnus is nervous, about touching Alex, about touching period, even with Alex's mouth sealed over his and a hand in his hair, steadying him from probably passing out in shock. it takes him a few long seconds, in turn, to work up the courage to rest his hand at the side of the other's neck. his palm lands so light and careful there, fingertips just brushing long green hair]
[the second kiss is -- stupidly charming, and it's this one he turns scarlet from, and when he laughs at what Alex has to say, it's clear and bright, summer-kissed; literally]
That -- [clears his throat, gone rough again] -- that, is such a weird way to ask somebody out? I mean, I'm not, like an expert.
[he's pretty sure that's what Alex is trying to say. not a hundred percent, though, and grey eyes are anxiously watching amber-and-brown, for a clue]
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he always touches alex like he's precious, and he should have known that it meant.. more. something else. (their rooms in valhalla are exactly alike, and that should have been their first hint.)
he scoots forward in the grass, and because he can, he tucks his folded legs in against magnus's, leaning forward and curling his hands atop the other teen's thighs. gods, this is so weird and new and right, and honestly kind of scary. ]
It's perfectly legitimate. [ yeah. yeah, he guesses he is asking him out. holy shit. ] Magnus Chase, you should definitely date me.
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[Magnus is still looking down and away, nervously smoothing hair back behind his ear, as he tries to pick a single thought out of the chaos of his brain, which, now that Ragnarok isn't descending around him, has become alarmingly real and physical and full to the brim of Alex Fierro]
Um. I'd, um. [god, he's so dumb? why won't Alex back up a bit, so he can think straight?] -- You make a compelling kiss. Case. Oh, my gods, please back up just a second, so I can make words and say yeah, ok? -- Oh.
[he just did. an amazing, Casanova-start, certainly]
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he finds he's grinning, heart feeling too big for his chest, and instead of backing off, he leans in further, kissing magnus again just because he can.
it's official, he guesses. he's turning into a sap, and he might be in love with magnus, and-- and now they're dating. ] You're ridiculous, but you're cute. [ he reaches up, gently pushing stray hair behind magnus's ear, then withdrawing to give them both some space. this is.. a lot. this is huge, for both of them, and neither of them are particularly touchy-feely most days. still, it feels good to want it, and to know that magnus doesn't mind. ]
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-- Wait. I forgot to say I, uh, that I, liked you... no, wait, I didn't forget, you didn't give me a chance, you just kept kissing me?
[his expression is dumbfounded by this reality, but then his determination rallies, wanting to make sure one thing is clear]
But I do. Um. Like you, that is. ...A lot.
[if Alex is turning into a sap, Magnus is turning into a disaster. he rubs his red face with both hands, hair getting a little wild from the treatment. ]
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but her mother isn't here, and alex won't let anything happen to magnus, either. ]
I know, [ he says at last, reaching out to gently tug at magnus's hands, drawing them away from his face so he can meet his eyes. ] If I hadn't realized, I wouldn't have said anything. It's-- [ his lips part, then shut, and his glance slides away from magnus's face, color rising in his face again. ] It's, uh, kind of hard to believe, since I know I'm a lot to deal with, but I'm.. happy. I guess.
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How is that hard to believe? You're, you. Who wouldn't like you...?
[more evidence of the sincere belief Magnus holds, that to him, Alex is beyond anything mortals -- or dead demigods -- could even dream of attaining. but then something hits him. an almost put-out look comes up on his face]
Wait. How did you know I liked you?
[he's pretty sure he kept that shit on lock? gods, he was barely letting himself think about it. was he really broadcasting it, or something...?]
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[ not to mention the lessons he'd learned while homeless, and the ones his parents had rather unintentionally taught him. magnus had been an unexpected, unlooked for, amazing gift.
he glances back up, then, lips quirking up. ] --Please. I'm not blind, Magnus. It took a while to put two and two together, but you get all doe-eyed around me sometimes.
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[he's not stupid, and he knows people -- unfortunately, a cynical side of them -- but he still doesn't quite see Alex's point. he was more than Loki's kid, argr was an oudated term for viking jocks, and being trans and genderfluid only made Alex more special and more unique than anyone else in the room by far. his personality was forged on those two hammers throughout his crap life, and he came out so strong and beautiful of a person for it. speaking of beautiful -- gods, that dress he wore to the swear in, when he was a she -- who gave a shit who her mom was, when she looked like that? who gave a shit who his mom was, sitting in front of Magnus, with the fire casting warm highlights into his long green hair? ugh]
[but it's something to argue about later, though, because he's just been insulted by the boy he's agreed to date, five seconds ago]
-- I do not get doe eyed. I'm a fearsome dead warrior of Odin, son of... ok, well, the Frey thing doesn't, er, really help me here, but. I'm not Bambi.
[he laughs, a flush riding high on his cheeks again]
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weird.
he stretches his legs out, because he wants the contact again, calf against the blond's hip. he's never liked people touching him, but now he can't seem to get enough of it. he wants to take magnus's hand again, just because he can, and it's the strangest impulse. (magnus likes him, all of him, male and female.) ]
It's cute, though. It's easy to care about you.
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[maybe it's something he should object to, along the same lines as "Bambi" or, in other conversations, "fuzzy" or "exceedingly Hufflepuff," but instead he's also grinning. if Alex Fierro thinks he's cute, he -- really can only be thrilled about it, honestly. he's stupidly, wonderfully thrilled about it, and it's all over his stupid rosy face, not quite hidden even behind his ducked head and hanging blond hair]
[when Alex presses his calf against his hip, Magnus, after a moment of clear hesitation (the impulse always feels natural, but to think he can touch him -- that he wants to touch him -- is, like it is for Alex, shockingly strange and new), Magnus drops his hand gently around Alex's ankle, just as he'd done a few weeks ago. it rests just as softly and carefully as it did then, but his smile is so much brighter]
[and, gods damn it to Friggin' Hel and a whole bunch of other Norse-themed swear words, when he looks at Alex, he's doe eyed, hopeless]
Um. So. We're dating.